Bridge-Building: Finding Common Ground Across Differing Beliefs

A few weeks ago, I was driving back from Cody with Ammon, the deputy director at Wyoming Equality. We had stopped at a little bakery in Thermop, delighted to discover they carried some of our stickers along with some wickedly good pastries. On our way out I got a call.

The gentleman, who I’ll call Bill, though that isn’t his name, came in hot. He’d read something on social media about drag queens and state dollars and he was, as they say, madder than a wet hen. I stayed on the phone with Bill for about 40 minutes and in that 40 minutes nothing much happened. He talked and I listened, and then I’d talk a bit and Bill would listen. This isn’t a story where I came away convinced of his position nor him of mine. But we did come closer to each other, and in these profoundly polarizing times, that seems worthy of celebrating. 

What complicated the situation was we didn’t have the same set of facts. My new friend Bill was convinced that state funds had been used in support of a cause he didn’t agree with. He believed that because he’d been encouraged to believe that—fear and suspicion of the “other” is a tried and true way of drumming up support. It is also a tried and true way of drumming up violence. 

As much as anything, I think that’s a large part of why I stayed on the phone with Bill. And why I think we should probably be talking a little bit more about what our opposition is aiming for when they stoke outrage over drag shows and banning books. We should pay attention to the language they use and who they direct it at. Words like “pedophile” and “groomer” are guns introduced in the first act—and if you remember your rules of the theater—the gun has to be fired in the third act.  

That should matter to anyone who hopes to salvage a Wyoming worth the heartache. Standing up against misinformation, claiming drag queens and libraries as precious—these are all acts of patriotism, important at any time but crucial right now. Governor Gordon recently joined his Democrat colleague, the Governor of Arizona, Governor Hobbs, in a series called, “Disagree Better.” It is a national effort that recognizes that the polarization we are facing right now has serious consequences for our democracy, and we all have a role to play in healing it. You can give it a listen here: Disagree Better. Braver Angels is another group attempting to address this division as well as Wyoming Humanities, and the statewide community conversations they are hosting through their Discuss & Construct program.

Maybe your church or civic organization is working on something to add to the conversation. Whatever it is, there is no time to lose.

The fruit this violent rhetoric reaps is predictable and bitter. We know from experience that hate that foments in these dark places will spill out into our homes and communities. After the fact is too late—the time to address the divide is now. 

If you are looking for a way to get involved, drop us a line. There are Pride festivals all over the state this summer, we’d love to see you there. There is so much to love and celebrate in our state, let's fight together to keep it.

In Love,

Sara Burlingame